Someone Should Get Working On This ASAP

You love your pants. And rightly so. They not only cover everything from the naval to ankles but the right ones set off our lower body attributes in a godlike fashion. And when we get that perfect pair we just love to wear them. Finally, they get worn in perfectly. And then, the horror. They wear out (or you get really wasted one night and wake up the next morning without your pants and you have absolutely no idea where you left them and you're too embarrassed to go looking for them because asking people "Have you seen my pants?" just sounds so lame). It happens to us all. This needn't be the catastrophe it has been until now.

We need a pant registration and retrieval service. You get your pants scanned, store the data and get issued a handy swatch with a personal PANTone number and if something happens to the pants you just let them know and a 3D print of a perfect duplicate happens and you get another pair exactly the same as your old ones shipped to you the very next day. Call it pant replacement insurance.

We need this. We have the technology. Someone should get on it.

Are you a super Sous-Chef? Save your favorite pan as a PANtone file. If the pan disappears in a kitchen nightmare, they shoot you an exact replica. And you're back cookin' again like nothing happened.

Collect rocks? Digital 3D PanSTONE storage and output would allow for limitless rockin' on.  Those gold nuggets you're sitting on? Never lose them down a toilet again.

Note: The 3D Replacement System would not work with living things or body parts. Inanimate objects only. (Cousin Billy-Bob would not qualify as an inanimate object.)

Okay, so someone get on this okay? I need to retire soon. Call me. We'll work out my end.