We have become so used to having these things within our reach we often give them no thought except to bitch when we can't find them. We take them for granted. We think of ourselves as their masters. But it's really the other way around. Try to pound a nail without a hammer or grate cheese without a grater. Or even close a door without a catch.
Silently, and without warning, tools and assorted hardware have nefariously exerted control over us simply by making themselves handy. We simply have to use them and when we do, they become our alpha rulers. Just having one gives us the power to do things we otherwise wouldn't have. In effect, we are giving control of the act over to it. We're not grating the cheese. We are not closing doors. They are. We are just supplying the muscle.We are mere eunuchs to their supreme reign over the world.
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Do not be alarmed: this is just a dramatization. We can't give life to inanimate objects, of course, except by recognizing their usefulness and putting them to work. Doing so is either just being plain weird or having an overactive imagination. Perhaps it was my lack of imaginary friends when young. Perhaps not...


love this!
ReplyDeleteThanks!
DeleteScary! I can live with my grater, but now I'm feeling paranoid about the door latches. There's a lot of them in my house. What if they all got together?!
ReplyDeleteI know!
Delete